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If you desire to be married, do not just wait until it “happens.” Your role is not passive. Of course, the desire to be married is no guarantee that it will happen. If you find that your efforts toward marriage remain unfulfilled, I can simply tell you that we have a loving God, and that he calls us all to be fruitful in whatever state we are in right now. Christian reader, we will all be married to Christ on that day!
We are to serve him with whatever he gives us: “Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms” (1 Peter , NIV). In the meantime, single men must learn to live out their sexuality in a way that prepares them for that ultimate wedding day.
Mark Dever The first thing to say about sex and the single man is, there should be none!
If you are not married, the Bible clearly teaches that you should refrain from any sexual contact. Sadly, heeding the Bible’s instruction is becoming more and more of a problem in our day, not only because people are marrying later, but because our culture values marriage less and less.
The ill effects of sex outside of marriage can be dealt with painlessly, so why should two consenting adults not feel free to enjoy something that is obviously pleasurable and good?
Other single men have never been married, but they want to marry.
Every such man’s calling now is to remain sexually pure, to grow in godliness, and to actively pursue marriage. spoke to me, saying, ‘Come, I will show you the Bride, the wife of the Lamb.’ And he carried me away in the Spirit to a great, high mountain, and showed me the holy city Jerusalem coming down out of heaven from God, having the glory of God” (21:9-11).
In those days, sex was the prize that women controlled, and the only way to win it was through the commitment of marriage.
A was in place: the privilege of sex in return for the promise to provide and protect.